rend my heart

Sometimes a word or a verse really grabs my attention.   This verse in Joel, and in particular, the word 'rend' captured my thoughts and attention.

Therefore also now, saith the Lord , turn ye even to me with all your heart, and with fasting, and with weeping, and with mourning:  And rend your heart, and not your garments, and turn unto the Lord your God: for he is gracious and merciful, slow to anger, and of great kindness, and repenteth him of the evil.
Joel 2:12‭-‬13 KJV

According to Merriam Webster Dictionary, rend means 1. To remove from place by violence: wrest,  2. To split or tear apart in pieces by violence, 3. To tear as a sign of anger, grief, or despair.

As I think about the context that Joel was writing these words I relate the lack of holiness and sinful state in which Israel had been found to where our current society, even the church itself can be found.

Joel was calling Israel to repent from the idol worship and the outright sinful state they had turned into. Israel had completely rebelled and turned away from God. God was so displeased, he allowed the natural consequences to transpire, sent other nations against Israel hoping they would realize that they were not doing the right things. He hoped that Israel would turn from the wickedness. He sent prophets to warn them and call them back to Him. Israel ignored the prophets. Israel suffered great consequences before they finally turned their hearts back to the God Almighty that had waited  and loved them deeply.  It was the hearts that were not committed, not in a position to love God.  They loved themselves, the pleasures of the world and the easy things. There had a hardening of their hearts to the things of God.  They were allowing sin to reign and had accepted this as a lifestyle.  Does this sound familiar?

Today, we are seeing consequences of a people wno have turned from God. We have a sinful, violent society  with no one willing to take the blame.  We see violence and lifestyles all around us and even in churches that reflect a love of self and pleasures rather than a love for God and His righteousness.  Many make excuses and set aside righteousness. We set aside the things of God and we do not take it serious as we begin to hear a call to turn back to Him.

Thankfully, God is slow to anger, full of grace and mercy. He is kind.  But he is calling His people to awaken.  The church needs to rend it's heart. The people of God need to rend their hearts; break their hearts for the sinful state we find around us.  We cannot stand idly by and make excuses for what is happening around us.  We need to turn our hearts to God, seek Him and let our hearts be broken for what is breaking the heart of God.  It is not His will for the suffering brought about by sin. It is not His will to see violence overtake us. It is His will to save souls and change lives for the better.   He wants to use His people, but we must be willing to be used.  He needs His people to follow after His heart. Our hearts need to be in tune with His heart. We are mistaken to think God does not see our sin. We are mistaken to think God does not want to help the lost and suffering. We are mistaken to think God does not love the hurting and even those that do the hurt. We, as the church, need to rend or tear our hearts apart to get to a place that we can feel compassion and be moved by those around us.  Are we concerned for the souls around us? Do we notice the world suffering around us enough to pray, to seek God on behalf of those that don't know God? Do we reach for the lost and dying? Do  we fast and pray with fervancy because we truly believe that God is the answer for the pain around us?  Have we allowed our hearts to be moved by the things that move God? Have we become numb and unwilling to move with the heart of God because we are too worried about our pleasure and status? Has the church become too bogged down in distraction to actually be the hands and feet of God?

May we arise from the slumber and the slow lull of sin that has blinded us, hardened our hearts and distracted us from the true purpose of the body of Christ. I pray that my heart be broken. I pray that I turn my heart, all my heart, to the work and service to which God is calling me. Are we willing to fully commit ourselves to Him and His purpose to see a change in our world?

  But without faith it is impossible to please him: for he that cometh to God must believe that he is, and that he is a rewarder of them that diligently seek him.
Hebrews 11:6 KJV

This is the generation of them that seek him, that seek thy face, O Jacob. Selah.
Psalms 24:6 KJV

As Joel wrote, let us seek the heart of God with prayer and fasting.  Let us mourn for the things that go against God. Let us seek to please the Lord and in doing so, bring about a spiritual change in our lives and in our communities. Rend our hearts, Lord. I rend my heart for you.

the best advice ever

Many people love to give advice.  Some of it is good and some of it not so good. We can choose to follow advice given to us or not to follow it. I do like to be given wise advice and try to take such advice to heart. I want to learn from those with wisdom and maybe avoid mistakes and problems when I can. That is one small reason  I really like to read the Bible.  I find so much wisdom and lessons for life in the accounts recorded in the Bible. God made sure the Bible addressed every part of life we will possibly face. Proverbs and Ecclesiastes are two books just packed full of good advise. These two books are accredited to King Solomon. When he became king of Israel,  he asked God for wisdom to be a good leader. God was so pleased by that request, he responded with not only great wisdom but wealth beyond imagination, peace and favor from around the known world, and a magnificent kingdom. 

One of the last verses in Ecclesiastes gives the very definition of our duty as a human being. This may be one of the best pieces of advice ever given.

Let us hear the conclusion of the whole matter: Fear God, and keep his commandments: for this is the whole duty of man.
Ecclesiastes 12:13 KJV

Basically, with all the wisdom and advice the teacher, or writer, of Ecclesiastes had written down, the conclusion that our very purpose is to fear God and obey His commands or law. 

It comes across as a simple thing yet this statement is one of the hardest bits of advice for mankind.  We are born into sin, full of selfish pride and often do not want to admit our need for God.  But, when we fully submit to the plan God has for us, we find rest, peace, and joy just by fearing God and keeping His commands.  This one piece of wisdom is quite weighty.  By keeping God's commands, we are able to fully submit our will and our lives into the hands of our Creator. This allows Him to pour blessings into our lives, use us for His glory and give us a testimony of His amazing grace. We cannot fully know our Savior until we understand that this is His plan all along.

From the beginning,  God has only asked mankind to follow His commands. It was Adam and Eve's choice not to follow His simple commands that ushered sin into this world. Our choices  now, to either follow His commands or not to do so, create the atmosphere of our lives to either be filled with the fruits of serving God or the fruits of our sin. We make the decisions that affect the outcomes in our lives. We decide to follow the commands or not.

So many people in this world, and especially in America, spend large amounts of time, energy and money trying to figure out who they are and what their purpose is.  I have witnessed teens ruin their lives trying to fit in, seeking pleasures, and trying to figure out who they are . I have witnessed a spouse being heartbroken as the other spouse walks away because they have determined that they have no purpose and need to find themselves.

The whole answer to each of these seeking questions lies in the Word of God.  Our whole duty, plan, and purpose lies in understanding that God has a perfect plan and it will be found by keeping His commands. We are given a choice to place ourselves into His loving hands by following those commands or continuing the cycle of searching through this sin soaked world never fully satisfied.
The Word of God is there and placed before us with all the direction and wisdom we could ever need. It gives us access to the Father, gives us understanding of His great mercy and love, and helps create the relationship He has been waiting to have with each of us.

The decision is ours. We can find our whole duty and our purpose given by our Loving Savior by following the advice of a wise a great wise man: fear God and follow His commands.

prepare for the storm

The past few days have brought us a lot of thunderstorms, including a nearby tornado. Yesterday morning after a particularly rough overnight storm, we found a large tree branch in the back yard. We really don't know where it came from. It was blown in. Storms come in the natural world. We have no control over when they come. All we can do is be prepared and seek safety. My husband prepares for storms and emergencies. He has an emergency backpack of supplies and makes sure it is always ready even when there are no storms in the area.  He stays prepared. We know we will have some basic supplies if we ever need them.

Spiritually, we also have storms that arise. We cannot control them, but we can be prepared spiritually to face the storms. We need to be ready even when there is no storm, when all seems right and in our favor.  We still need to be on watch and ready to face a storm. Storms come when we least expect them.
We need to be be on guard and prepared to face situations that may seem to flood over us and overwhelm our soul. We are going to face trials and storms. In this life, we are guaranteed troubles. These struggles come as part of life, but we do not have to be spiritually blindsided. We can be prepared.

Therefore let us not sleep, as do others; but let us watch and be sober.
1 Thessalonians 5:6 KJV

When we keep ourselves in a position of drawing closer to God with prayer, study and relationship, we are keeping ourselves in a state of readiness. We will know that in a moment's notice,  we can call on our heavenly Father as a storm begins to brew and blow in our lives. God is ready to hear our prayer and will stand up for us.

So shall they fear the name of the Lord from the west, and his glory from the rising of the sun. When the enemy shall come in like a flood, the Spirit of the Lord shall lift up a standard against him.
Isaiah 59:19 KJV

We know we can run to Him and find safety, protection and strength to face any storm that comes our way.

The name of the Lord is a strong tower: the righteous runneth into it, and is safe.
Proverbs 18:10 KJV

His Word is full of promises for us to find strength and in which we can take refuge. We can trust Him through every storm and trial because we have prepared ourselves even when life seemed good and free of struggle. We cannot always lean back and coast along.  We must spend some time in preparation for rough times.
I recall scenes of people boarding up windows and packing sandbags when hurricanes were being predicted to hit coastal areas. They were preparing days in advance. They did not wait till the hurricane was already blowing and flooding their homes and businesses. They were preparing. This did not divert the storm, nor did it keep the storm from causing great struggle and difficulty, but in many cases, it helped them endure and maintain a standing structure.

We will not be able to stand through some of our storms without preparation. We are not strong enough on our own. We need God to bear us up. We need Godly brothers and sisters standing with us in prayer and in faith. We need God and God alone to get through some of the rough storms that blow our way.

Now the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, that ye may abound in hope, through the power of the Holy Ghost.
Romans 15:13 KJV

We can place our hope in Jesus and know that He will be our peace and our safety to go through every storm and trial. We can build this faith and hope during the good times and the blessings so we can still be standing as the storm blows and brings with it the struggle.
We may need to rebuild some and make a few repairs, but we will know that God carried us through and we are still able to stand and say that He is our strong tower. We will still be praising because He gave us strength. We will still know that He is God  and we have peace in the midst of any storm.  We can prepare to face what comes our way when we have God as our place of refuge and strength. Are you ready to face the storm?

a strong woman is...

For my daughter:
As a mother of a daughter who is growing up very quickly, I am becoming very aware of what type of woman I hope she becomes. There has been a lot of media attention placed on the idea that women need to be strong. There are a lot of images being pushed and concepts portraying women who appear strong according to the current idea of what a strong woman should be. In today's media, a strong woman is independent, on her own, doesn't need a man, decides her own fate, and declares her ambition and self-pride in the face of any who dare question her. I see young girls following after the pattern of those in media telling us to be proud and loud, to be our own person who needs no one.

I dare say, I do not believe this is what a strong woman is or should be.  I grew up with many women  role models whom I always view as strong and amazing.  I grew up hoping to emulate these strong women. They were not famous. They were not on television, in politics, or in books. They were ordinary women living what most would call ordinary lives.  They were my grandmothers, aunts, and women in my church family. They were wives and mothers. They were followers of Jesus Christ.  They were beautiful, hard working, and strong. They were needed and also relied on others as they partnered with husbands and others to make sure things were accomplished. Most of all, they trusted God.

While society in general has misconstrued the value of being a wife and mother, these women in my life have lived out what it means to be a valuable wife and  mother. They fought hard to feed their children, make a home, and support their husbands. They were valued and important. They understood that as a wife, they were a partner with their spouse. They worked together with their husbands to make a good life, to raise their children to be a good part of society, and demonstrated great faith along the way.  I grew up watching these women and hearing their stories of overcoming great obstacles and struggles. I watched my maternal grandmother carry on after the loss of my grandfather as she still had her younger children to take care of. She worked hard, she raised a garden and canned food  to make sure her children never went hungry. She started off every morning early with her Bible and prayer and a very clean house.  I watched my paternal grandmother suffer the loss of two of her daughters. She never once gave in to anger or self pity. She, instead, clung to Jesus and faith that He was carrying them through it all. I remember stories told of how prayer and faith was answered with miracles. A dear woman I grew up admiring told of how she and her husband woke up to find their baby dead. They prayed and he came back to life. She told of how when they had no food, she prayed and God supplied.  I heard of travels and moving across the country with small children and perils faced from my grandmother and great aunt. I watched my own mother, day in and day out, care for us and many others. As a pastor's  wife, she had a lot on her plate, but she did not give up. She fought for others, prayed hard, worked hard and made a difference to many people.  I admired the courage and faith of my mother in law as she laid her husband to rest. These women imparted wisdom to their children, equipped them to live successful lives, and lived out their faith unabashedly. They were and are Biblically strong women. I have many women in my life right now whom carry on day to day as strong wives and mothers.  Not at all what media would consider as the example they want to advertise.

I go to Proverbs chapter 31. There is a description of  a truly strong woman.

Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies.  The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her, so that he shall have no need of spoil.  She will do him good and not evil all the days of her life.  She seeketh wool, and flax, and worketh willingly with her hands.  She is like the merchants' ships; she bringeth her food from afar.  She riseth also while it is yet night, and giveth meat to her household, and a portion to her maidens.  She considereth a field, and buyeth it: with the fruit of her hands she planteth a vineyard.  She girdeth her loins with strength, and strengtheneth her arms.  She perceiveth that her merchandise is good: her candle goeth not out by night.  She layeth her hands to the spindle, and her hands hold the distaff.  She stretcheth out her hand to the poor; yea, she reacheth forth her hands to the needy.  She is not afraid of the snow for her household: for all her household are clothed with scarlet.  She maketh herself coverings of tapestry; her clothing is silk and purple.  Her husband is known in the gates, when he sitteth among the elders of the land.  She maketh fine linen, and selleth it; and delivereth girdles unto the merchant.  Strength and honour are her clothing; and she shall rejoice in time to come.  She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness.  She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness.  Her children arise up, and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praiseth her.  Many daughters have done virtuously, but thou excellest them all.  Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth the Lord , she shall be praised.  Give her of the fruit of her hands; and let her own works praise her in the gates.
Proverbs 31:10‭-‬31 KJV

This woman is described as wise, hardworking, shrewd in business, a homemaker, and highly regarded by both her husband and children. She is an example of faith and praised by her husband and children.  She has earned this praise because of her strength of character and great care of her responsibilities.  She has worked day in and day out to make sure her family and home were cared for and excelled at her endeavors in and out of the home. None of this was about about self, but it was selfless and sacrificial. She gave of herself  for her family. Yet, she is highly valuable, of a price far above rubies.
The role of wife and mother is respected and valued by God as it is described here in Proverbs. She is greatly valued.

Society has taken away the value of the role of a wife and mother. We are told that we must choose between  being a wife and mother and being successful in society. We are told these roles are weak and worthless by media.

The Bible description is the opposite of the societal description of a strong woman.  Not once, did I ever see these women as less than equal or less than strong. They were partners with their spouses, spoke their mind, gave valuable input, and were respected and loved. They were and are my superheroes.  They are my living examples of what a strong woman should be.

I aspire to live a life as equally powerful and strong. I want my daughter to see a woman who is a wife and mother who lives a life full of faith. I want her to know she will be valuable in those roles as well as any career she may choose to pursue. She can stand in faith and live a life that portrays Jesus to her own children someday. I want her to know that strong women do not need to shout about how strong they are in the faces of all she meets. She will be praised by her children and husband.  She will be blessed because of the work she puts into her family and daily life. Her daily persistence and faithfulness will speak volumes of her worth.  I pray she sees how strong of a woman she can be when she leans on Jesus  and His Word. I pray that I can be an example of a strong Godly woman she will want to emulate. I pray she fulfills the description in Proverbs 31. May she see all the ordinary women around her and understand the strength they carry within them.

May all women be valued for they are precious in God's eyes. They are designed and given great purpose. They are to be partners and mothers. They are to be providers and keepers of hearts and homes. They are to be consistent and enduring. They are to be wise and faithful. May we attain this kind of strength knowing there are young girls in need of Godly examples of what it really means to be strong. May we seek to attain true strength.

the burden and blessing of example

During a worship service, as a member of the worship team, I get the privilege of being able to see a lot of what people in the sanctuary do during worship. The other night, as the pastor had called up some folks who needed special prayer, I watched one of our 4 year old little girls on the front row.  As people were being touched and moved by the presence of God at the altar, she was watching intently, raising her hands, praying in her own way. She was responding to the presence of God. She was taking in what she was seeing. She was learning from what she could see happening at that altar.  She was seeing examples of faith right before her and learning from them. I have also sat in Sunday school with the little ones and had another 4 year old little girl tell me about how mommy says bad words that only grownups can say and not little kids. She had a few more things to say. Her example at home is not consistent with what she is being told. She sees an example that does not glorify God in word.  What will she follow when she grows up.

1 Timothy 4:12
Let no man despise thy youth; but be thou an example of the believers, in word, in conversation(conduct-NIV), in charity, in spirit, in faith, in purity.

1 Timothy 4:12-14 The Message (MSG)
11-14 Get the word out. Teach all these things. And don’t let anyone put you down because you’re young. Teach believers with your life: by word, by demeanor, by love, by faith, by integrity. Stay at your post reading Scripture, giving counsel, teaching. And that special gift of ministry you were given when the leaders of the church laid hands on you and prayed—keep that dusted off and in use.

As a Christian, we are called to be examples in several areas of our lives. We are called to live our faith before others so we can inspire them to also live a life pleasing to God.

Paul instructed Timothy to be an example in several areas:

-word    -the things we say, they are life and death, they betray or reveal our heart
               Psalm 19:14
                Let the words of my mouth, and the meditation of my heart, be acceptable in thy sight,   
                O LORD, my strength, and my redeemer.

-conversation/conduct- our conduct, actions reveal our walk with God
1 Samuel 2:3
             Talk no more so exceeding proudly; let not arrogancy come out of your mouth: for
             the LORD is a God of knowledge, and by him actions are weighed.

-charity –our love of others reflects the love God has for them
1 John 4:7
Beloved, let us love one another: for love is of God; and every one that loveth is born of God, and knoweth God.

-spirit- walk in the Spirit, spirit of God, not our own spirit, (faith and spirit combined in some versions), this may also be your attitude and demeanor
Galatians 5:16
This I say then, Walk in the Spirit, and ye shall not fulfil the lust of the flesh.

-faith –faith is what we believe, and how we respond to what we believe
Philemon 1:6
That the communication of thy faith may become effectual by the acknowledging of every good thing which is in you in Christ Jesus.

-purity –this is the reflection of choosing what is right. Of allowing even our private thoughts and private life to reflect God’s holiness and purity-his cleansing that has been done and is being done in us.
Proverbs 20:11
Even a child is known by his doings, whether his work be pure, and whether it be right.

Each of these areas need to reflect Christ working in us. Or words and conduct need to reflect the love and Spirit of God. Our faith should be revealed by how we react in every moment. Purity should be upheld in and made clear even in the private moments no one else may see. Those private moments alone are often revealed as God knows the thoughts and intents of our hearts. The thoughts in our hearts are what come out of of our mouths and become our actions. Our example must he consistent regardless of our location or who is or isn't around.

We are also called to be separate from the world. We are to live a life that is different and set apart for the display of God working in our lives. In 2 Corinthians chapter 6 Paul explains that we are a temple of the Living God. We are to be set apart for His Spirit to operate and dwell in us.

16 And what agreement hath the temple of God with idols? for ye are the temple of the living God; as God hath said, I will dwell in them, and walk in them; and I will be their God, and they shall be my people.
17 Wherefore come out from among them, and be ye separate, saith the Lord, and touch not the unclean thing; and I will receive you.
18 And will be a Father unto you, and ye shall be my sons and daughters, saith the Lord Almighty.

We should be a different kind of person. We should stand out, We may not fit in. We should not fit in with the sin around us.

Why is our example so important? I recently read that young people are leaving churches because they are not seeing faith lived out in their homes.  They aren’t seeing their parents live what they say they believe. The faith talked about on Sunday morning  is not evident in the lives of the parents and others they see. What children see and hear in the home is more important than anything else when it comes to raising a child to have faith and relationship with Jesus.  If those telling them about Jesus, aren’t living a life that reflects Him, they are losing that child. Many leave the church or see no need because there is no difference between a Christian or a sinner.The ‘Do as I say not as I do” – attitude has become accepted. We cannot tell a child or any one else to live a certain way and not be an example. We need to show them what faith in God can do.

Complacency in our daily walk has become the norm and we accept a lot to things we should not. We do a lot of things we should not and forget to do things we should be doing for the Kingdom of God.

The definition of complacency means a feeling of contentment or self-satisfaction, often combined with a lack of awareness of pending trouble or controversy.

Effects of complacency are little things creeping in and  no longer alert or alarm us. We allow sinful habits and slowly we move away from God rather than toward Him. Amos warned Israel of this.

Amos 6:1.4-7 NIV
Woe to you who are complacent in Zion,
    and to you who feel secure on Mount Samaria,
you notable men of the foremost nation,
    to whom the people of Israel come!
 You lie on beds adorned with ivory
    and lounge on your couches.
You dine on choice lambs
    and fattened calves.
5 You strum away on your harps like David
    and improvise on musical instruments.
6 You drink wine by the bowlful
    and use the finest lotions,
    but you do not grieve over the ruin of Joseph.

Spiritually Complacent has been shown in research. Barna Research reports that since ’91, Americans have become more spiritually complacent. 40% of born again Christians do not attend church or read the Bible in a typical week, 30% are not "absolutely committed to the Christian faith" and 70% are not involved in a small group that meets for spiritual purposes. The percent-age of adults who can be classified as "born again" rose from 35% in ‘91 to 41% in ‘01. However, participation in 4 key behaviors declined; Bible reading (down from 45% to 37%); church attendance (from 49% to 42%); volunteering at church (from 27% to 20%); and adult Sunday school attendance (from 23% to 19%). (Barna Online 3/5/01)

The Church, the people of God, need to realize that it is time to rise up and fulfill the walk that God has called us to: to be an example, a light set on a hill, a holy priesthood. Not only when we go to the church building, but in our daily routines, activities, interactions, work places and especially in our homes.

The Psalmist said Let the word of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable.
Psalm 19: 7-14
7 The law of the LORD is perfect, converting the soul: the testimony of the LORD is sure, making wise the simple.
8 The statutes of the LORD are right, rejoicing the heart: the commandment of the LORD is pure, enlightening the eyes.
9 The fear of the LORD is clean, enduring for ever: the judgments of the LORD are true and righteous altogether.
10 More to be desired are they than gold, yea, than much fine gold: sweeter also than honey and the honeycomb.
11 Moreover by them is thy servant warned: and in keeping of them there is great reward.
12 Who can understand his errors? cleanse thou me from secret faults.
13 Keep back thy servant also from presumptuous sins; let them not have dominion over me: then shall I be upright, and I shall be innocent from the great transgression.
14 Let the words of my mouth, and the meditation of my heart, be acceptable in thy sight, O LORD, my strength, and my redeemer.

I want to be an example that will attract people to Christ, not turn them off or run them off. I want my life to stand as a walking testimony of God's love and faithfulness. I want people to see what God can do by how I live in faith, love and deed.

Matthew 5:13-18
13 Ye are the salt of the earth: but if the salt have lost his savour, wherewith shall it be salted? it is thenceforth good for nothing, but to be cast out, and to be trodden under foot of men.
14 Ye are the light of the world. A city that is set on an hill cannot be hid.
15 Neither do men light a candle, and put it under a bushel, but on a candlestick; and it giveth light unto all that are in the house.
16 Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father which is in heaven.

Our example is seen by those around us. What are they going to see in us that will attract them to Christ?  I hope they see a working of faith that does not fall in the face of adversity. I hope they see a growing example of patience and love that gives Grace and mercy when it is not earned.  I hope they feel love and hope when I am around. I hope the feel the drawing of the presence of God that calls us to  a place of repentance and earnest living for God. I do not want to be an example of complacency and sin that is hidden behind closed doors. One of the greatest testimonies of a pastor that passed  is when his daughter spoke of him and said that the man you saw in church was the same man they saw at home every day. I want my children to say that of me.  I don’t want to appear one way at church and then be completely different in my home. I want my children to see me live what I say and profess about God. I want my daily life to reflect the promises of God. I want to be example that draws men to God not drive them away.

Hebrews 4:11
11 Let us labour therefore to enter into that rest, lest any man fall after the same example of unbelief.

I pray we can live as examples to this world that will show the love of Christ. I pray we take seriously that our example is our testimony of who God is to those around us. Our choices, words, and actions reflect Christ Jesus and what He can do. If we choose not to reflect him in our private actions and in our daily loves, we are failing to give others a true picture God in action. We are to reflect Christ in a way that will make others want Him, not push them away. What we say and do has great influence on those around us.  They need to see God working in us to really understand what He can do for them. We are called to  be an example. This may seem like a weighty burden. We become responsible for our actions and words. We are to bear responsibility. But, this is also a blessing.  We can be blessed as our example grows and we see souls attracted to Christ through our influence. We can be blessed as we can mentor and help guide others to live for Christ. We can continue to grow in wisdom and knowledge of who God is as we lead others. We can be a positive influence as long as we guard our testimony and example as precious and important. May we balance the burden with the blessing of example. May we lead them into the deep of serving God wholeheartedly with no reservations.

whom have I on earth beside Thee

Last week, I was listening to a sermon that our pastor was preaching and this verse caught my attention.

Psalms 73:25-26

²⁵ Whom have I in heaven but thee? and there is none upon earth that I desire beside thee. ²⁶ My flesh and my heart faileth: but God is the strength of my heart, and my portion for ever.

I was immediately struck that this same phrase is part of an old hymn that I have always loved. Pass Me Not, O Gentle Savior. Hymns are not always popular much anymore and not all of them will be remembered as time goes on, but there are some Biblical truths that I have learned because we sang these hymns often. This one in particular floods into my soul and reminds me of a Savior that is always present, always ready and willing to comfort and care about me.

Pass me not, O gentle Savior
Hear my humble cry
While on others Thou art calling
Do not pass me by

Let me at Thy throne of mercy
Find a sweet relief
Kneeling there in deep contrition
Help my unbelief

Trusting only in Thy merit
Would I seek Thy face
Heal my wounded, broken spirit
Save me by Thy grace

Thou the spring of all my comfort
More than life to me
Whom have I on earth beside Thee?
Whom in Heav’n but Thee?

Savior, Savior
Hear my humble cry
While on others Thou art calling
Do not pass me by

Too often, we are caught up in living and forget to recognize that our Savior is to be our first love. He is to be all we desire. We should be able to live a life reflecting this truth that “there is none upon earth that I desire beside thee.”  This should be the desire that supercedes all other desires. We should be putting Him first. All other things in life are taken care of by our mighty savior, Jesus. He promised in His word to take care of all our needs.

Matthew 6:33

³³ But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you.

Have we taken time to evaluate our first love?  Are we loving something more than we love our Lord?  Have we left our first love? In Revelations chapter 2, it was written:

⁴ Nevertheless I have somewhat against thee, because thou hast left thy first love.

Our first love must be God. We cannot permit anything else in this world to come first. He must be our first love. All of our faith, our hope, our trust must be placed in Him. He alone can provide the peace, joy, hope, healing and comfort we need in any situation we face. He alone can carry us through. He alone died in our place and made a way for us. He alone loved us when we were unlovable. He alone is what we need. Our hearts, our lives should belong to Him first.   We need to come before His throne of grace and humbly find that first love waiting.

not my plan, but His

I would probably have not chosen to endure and experience some of the things I have faced. I would not have chosen to experience loss, sickness, or worry. I don't like uncertainty and I certainly do not like watching any one struggle or suffer. I would not have chosen for my son to be born with a birth defect and need to go through multiple surgeries. While I say I would not have chosen it, I am also quite thankful and blessed to have realized that God has always known and has never stopped loving us through it all. 

I will never forget that moment when my son was born and the joy quickly turning to fear and heartache as we realized he had a cleft lip and palate. That little baby boy was blue and lifeless from a very difficult delivery. He was whisked away from me as I lay and begged God to help my baby.  I could do nothing but pray in that moment. My only hope was in God in that moment. When that little cry could be heard, a flood of relief poured over me. The doctors took him off to the NICU and took blood samples to determine the effects of lack of oxygen. We cried and prayed. I am so grateful that all those tests came back with perfectly normal tests results and our prayers were answered. 

We knew that we faced many surgeries and that journey has been filled with ups and downs. My little boy has been ever an example of faith and endurance. From a tumor in his ear to palate and lip repairs, he has never failed to say Jesus would heal. When he was eight years old, One of his surgeries completely failed. All the stitches in the roof of his mouth broke and all the work done was completely reversed. The surgery meant to seal and elongate his palate ended up with a shortened palate. The result was even more difficulty with speaking and eating. He refused to go back to that surgeon and refused more surgery.

It took a lot of prayer and trusting, but God led us to a new doctor. My sweet boy at the age of 12, agreed to have one more major surgery that combined two surgeries into one event. The pain was rough, recovery was hard, A severe reaction to antibiotics sent us to the ER. But here we are 5 months later with the test results that we could only hope and pray for. The air flow through his nose is absolutely testing in the normal range. My sweet little boy can walk in a restaurant and order his own food without mom or dad having to repeat his order. 

There is a relief to know that God has been operating for my son's good all along. Even with the setbacks, God has ordered our steps. We have ended up in the offices of some of the best surgeons for the specific need he had. Only God could have orchestrated the timing and process. We would have never known about the tumor in his ear until it had caused great damage, if our new dentist had not recommended we reach out to a state agency. That led us to the doctor who had pioneered the surgery for removing this particular tumor with the least amount of damage. My son has perfect hearing thanks to the efforts of that man and God's leading. My son has normal airflow through his nose today for speaking and eating due to getting into his current surgeon. God has led us down this path in ways I cannot even explain at times. I know he has had his hand on my son from the minute he was a thought in my mind. God has given my son a testimony and witness of God's healing and faithfulness. 

My son is always quick to pray, quick to trust God,and will always say, "Pray," when he knows only God can answer. 

Luke 12:4-7

4 And I say unto you my friends, Be not afraid of them that kill the body, and after that have no more that they can do.

5 But I will forewarn you whom ye shall fear: Fear him, which after he hath killed hath power to cast into hell; yea, I say unto you, Fear him.

6 Are not five sparrows sold for two farthings, and not one of them is forgotten before God?

7 But even the very hairs of your head are all numbered. Fear not therefore: ye are of more value than many sparrows.

This scripture always reminds me that we are deeply loved and care for by God. He watches over every bird and we are much more valuable. We have nothing to fear when we can place all of our trust in God. 

Isaiah 55:9 says "For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways, and my thoughts than your thoughts." 

This tells me that my plans may not be what God has in store or even what life may hand me, but God can take what I have and what is handed to me and turn it into something beautiful. He can take what we have and give us a testimony and a witness of his love, grace and faithfulness. I understand that we may not always choose our circumstances or experiences, but God can use them for good. For our good, for the good of others,and His glory will be revealed. He does not leave us or forsake us in the middle of a struggle, He makes a way that leads to victory and joy on the other side. 

My plans are not His plans, but when I put all my trust in Him, His plans are revealed and lead me to a place of peace and faith I cannot reach without the history of a struggle. For all the struggles, I am thankful and grateful, for it has taught me that God is always taking care of the situation. He sees the long term and knows what is best. I am learning to just trust Him.

Place all your trust in God for He knows what tomorrow holds.